The Top 10 Things You Loved And Bought Last Month: October Edition (Plus one Big Ticket Item We Did NOT Expect But 100% Approve)

Happy Saturday folks. Today we are back with a new favorite series of ours (here was last month’s). It’s one where we get to really analyze what products you guys loved and bought via the site and it happens to be delightful and intriguing data to compile. I am not one that is blessed with a “number crunching” brain but this type of data is FASCINATING to me. It is really fun seeing what you guys click on and it helps us understand what type of product recommendations you want to see from us in the future. It is also super validating when one of us recommends something we love and you all trust us enough to try it out yourself. Not to mention, there is a bit friendly competition around here to see who’s recs made it to the top 10 So, let’s get to it, shall we?

10. Ceramic Minimalist Vase

Ironically, when Mallory talked about this vase in this controversial post last week, the comments suggested y’all were not on board with these Instagram trends. But this vase was clearly an exception and I totally get why. It is beautiful, minimal, sculptural, and reasonably priced plus it would look GORGEOUS on this foam table, no??

9. Sequin Unicorn Tulle Long Sleeve Dress

I am not surprised this little number made the top 10 list. This unicorn tulle dress is so dang cute and happens to be one that Miss Elliot Henderson won’t take off. It is sparkly AND has a unicorn. Plus it was one of her birthday presents so maybe the strategy is to never take it so her birthday never ends?? True genius. Regardless of a potential secret plan, it’s a slam dunk for any unicorn loving kid.

8. Harriet Pleated Floor Lamp

I am so pleased you guys liked this one as much as I did. I was contemplating purchasing this one but ultimately went with this Harriet Pleated Floor Lamp for my living room and I can tell you I made the right choice. It is a real beauty in person and looks perfect next to my beloved article sofa. Also, if you look in the comments the woman who actually DESIGNED this beauty, Ellen, commented. WHAT?? I still can’t get over it.

7. Women’s V Neck Bra

Just judging from the product photo, this bra looks like the most comfortable bra ever, but luckily both Jess and Emily can personally attest that it is an absolute game-changer. Emily first brought our attention to it in this post and convinced us ladies with larger “ladies” that it is the one “bralette” that truly works. Naturally, Jess loves it so much she bought herself 3 so she can always have them in rotation. Oh, and did I mention it’s only $23??

6. Cheri Longline Cardigan

Caitlin recommended this guy when we all rounded up our favorite cardigans and it is the perfect blend between coat and snuggly cardigan — AKA it is ideal for zoom meetings where you are rocking business on top and pajamas on the bottom or a quick run to the grocery store. Honestly, it’s ideal for nearly every setting.

5. Samsung Frame TV

This one was a bit of a shock only because big ticket items rarely make the top 10 list. But that aside, the Frame TV is a long time EHD favorite. They aren’t lying when they say it’s the most beautiful TV in the world. Plus remember when Em did that awesome partnership with them? I mean who could forget this incredible 120-year barn makeover (one of my personal favorite EHD projects), the idyllic, serene greenhouse makeover, the boathouse transformation, and of course the very fun and bold barge. Clearly, we are huge advocates of it and it is A GREAT investment if you are in the market for a new TV that will blend seamlessly into your decor.

4. Frisco Eyelash Cat & Dog Bolster Bed

It is pretty common knowledge here at EHD that Caitlin has the cutest most snuggly cat. We often see her waltzing over her owner’s keypad just because she needs some love and affection. So, of course, Caitlin treats her to the most snuggly cat bed of all time. To be fair, if I were a cat or dog I would want to cozy up in one of these (who am I kidding, I’d want to as a human as well).

3. Eve Pump

Emily has had these pumps for a while now and I believe they first made their debut in this fashion post where she coined the name of her boss lady alter-ego “THE CLOSER”. These are seriously power heels and when they went on sale Mal jumped at the opportunity to snag them, and apparently many of you did too. (Oh, and if you are a size 10 and want the white ones, they are available here).

2. Clarte Short Tumblers

I was also #emfluenced when Emily recommended these $8 (!!) 4 pk tumbler glasses. Emily explained that for the longest time she was ordering these Marta glasses becuase they were modern, delicate, and were the perfect size. However, they would break sooo easily. She thought there was no solution until these babies came along. Basically exactly the same but thicker! As someone who has broken a glass (or 50) in my day, I ordered them so fast once Emily vouched they are the perfect everyday glass and they DON’T break.

1. High-Rise Skinny Jeans in Danny Wash

These jeans have been selling for weeks and we totally understand why. Jess rocks them in this post and describes them as THE perfect skinny jeans. According to her they are the perfect high rise height, are super comfortable and the wash is awesome. So again, THE perfect skinny jeans.

Annnd there you have it. These are our top 10 sellers and I am dying to know if you purchased any of them and if so, have they lived up to our hype?? Let us know below and have a lovely weekend and a HAPPY HALLOWEEN. xx

In case you missed it, check out what you bought and loved last month here.

Opener Image Credit: Photo by Sara Ligorria-Tramp | From: 14 Rules for How We Style the Perfect Bedroom (+ 3 New Reveals)

The post The Top 10 Things You Loved And Bought Last Month: October Edition (Plus one Big Ticket Item We Did NOT Expect But 100% Approve) appeared first on Emily Henderson.

from Emily Henderson https://stylebyemilyhenderson.com/blog/best-skinny-jeans-for-every-body

New Fashion On My Body: The One Where I Dressed Like A Fisherwoman, Wore 6 Great Coats, AND An All Star Pair Of Boots

It’s been a while since we did a new, original fashion post but we were all itching for some new shots, many perhaps where I dress like a fisherman. Listen, I’m out of practice, my fashion-forward friend couldn’t help me, and besides! there is an annual kids trout competition up here next weekend and girlfriend wants to get in the local paper. So, this week Veronica drove up and we safely shot me donning 6 different coats outside (along with pants, shoes, shirts, and underthings, duh). I even did my own hair and put on, how do you say, makeup?

So are you ready for the first real fashion shoot in who knows how long?? Here we go…

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Coat | Jeans | Boots | Beanie

I’ve already determined the winner of this coat roundup and it’s THOSE BOOTS. But first, the coat. This might be my favorite as it is different enough from what I already owned and that excited me. It’s short and boxy, with a tall collar, and dropped shoulders. It was wide enough to easily layer (a huge plus) and hit the top of my pants in a way that still felt flattering and not overwhelming. It was a HIT. And that olive green color is so fall meets winter.

Now onto these wonderful boots. I just got these or I would have put them in the boot post last week. What makes them so good? Glad you asked. They are wide, tall, and stiff which makes them almost like the profile of rainboots in a really cute (and yes, flattering) way. AND YET, these are black leather, square-toed, and have a chunky comfortable heel. I wore them with very skinny black jeans and I felt cute (even cool) for the first time in months. Perhaps we are turning the corner in this quarantine and starting to care more about our outfits and looks? HAHAHA. Nope. Not quite yet for me, but cute fall/winter boots that make you feel even remotely that way are a great start.

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Coat | Jeans | Boots | Beanie (similar)

Now here is a non-basic and yet totally classic/utilitarian denim jacket. I welcome Wrangler into my life anytime. This guy is AWESOME. Boxy (but a bit longer) skinny sleeves/fitted armpits, cool big square pockets, corduroy details … it’s good. Good for layering. Good for just looking cool in fall. My only issue with it is that for those of us who have larger love pillows, the pockets add some bulk so from some angles it wasn’t too flattering, but they lay flat (the pockets, not the love pillows) so it wasn’t a big deal.

Almost everything else besides coats (and those epic boots) I already had. The beanie is from J.Crew (but sadly sold out) and the rain boots are from Target.

Coat | Jeans | Shirt | Boots | Beanie (similar)

Next up is a QUILTED. DENIM. BLANKET. COAT. I have been touting the trendiness of quilted denim for months and it just never hit (I have a quilted denim ottoman, yards of vintage quilted denim – just waiting for the perfect piece of furniture to cover/ruin). So yes, this one is so big and cozy and layerable. It’s roomy so size down (unless you want to layer large sweaters underneath it). She has cute button details, a big chunky neck collar, and such a happy but subdued color. Side note: when I write these posts I kinda feel like I should have been that game show host voice that calls out all the features on the fridge on, say, The Price Is Right. No?

Anyway, I wore it with what has quickly become one of my favorite t-shirts that I forgot about – a signature design from one of my favorite home stores in LA (Lost and Found), but here is a great one, too. Paired again with those great boots and this time a slouchier beanie.

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Coat | Jeans | Shirt | Boots

Here’s where I really start to feel like a real lady. Sure, same pants, old boots and same t-shirt as before but I’ve never met an ‘elegant’ teddy until this one. The slim black arms make it actually flattering (I have a real love/hate with teddys as they are just like wearing a blanket – comfortable but bulky). This one feels proper and elegant in a way that makes me wonder if someday when we live in a city again I might want to impress people. Also guys, I haven’t had my hair done since February. All summer I went to a salon called ‘supermarket sun-in or lemon juice’ and frankly it kinda worked up until now (I know it’s not good for your hair, but neither was taking the risk to drive 2 hours to a then – city full of covid just to ALSO bleach your hair … but yes Johnny Ramirez might be coming to some dull hair very soon).

Coat | Jeans | Shirt | Boots

Now this cropped teddy is for those you want volume up top in both the bodice and the sleeves. I’m on the fence about it. I loved the color (a pretty cream) and the collar (seeing this collar everywhere) and the crop (hits the top of jeans in a good way), but the proportions are bulky. I know that this is a thing, that people are into oversized everything so if you are one of those people then this lady is for you (I’m wearing XS and I’m normally an S, but I guess if you are into the oversized thing then you might want to oversize anyway?). I wore them with my favorite dre jeans (why my favorite? Low rise, roomy waist that never cuts in, skinny crotch that is flattering and the perfect boy legs, oh and a good cropped length). Speaking of jeans, my team did a great denim roundup a couple weeks ago and after 2 years of wearing these would love the same version without holes. Does that exist?

I then wore them with my 15-year-old FRYE boots (I got them for my 7th birthday!). But really, I splurged on them when I was 23, wore them for years, and I’ve schlepped them from New York, to Santa Monica (fun fact we lived there for 6 months before DesignStar), then Silver Lake, Glendale, Los Feliz, and now up to Lake Arrowhead. They’ve been in a box the entire time. They are FINALLY back in style (I’m sure they never left, but I wasn’t that into them until now). But guess what???? Those mother-loving puppies chewed up the top TWO NIGHTS AGO. Like after 15 years of hoarding these, waiting for them to return to the zeitgeist to only now that they get chewed up by one Buttercup Henderson. Luckily part of their charm is how rustic they are so I’m embracing the rip and returning the dog to the pound.

Up next are two denim jackets I’ve had for a while but they are still so good and available.

Jacket | Shirt | Jeans | Boots | Beanie

The classic sherpa lined Levi jacket never gets old. Pair it with an organically ripped up vintage sweatshirt (ooh SNAP, those pups could come in handy yet! Maybe if I wear a sweatshirt around like underwear and leave it out they’ll be “inspired” to give it that vintage look full of holes that we love??! They are VERY into my underwear. Flattering, I know!). These jean jackets can be bulky too, by the way, but the crop and style are good. So if you have larger love pillows size up (or don’t layer over sweatshirts).

I wore them with my favorite “standing jeans” – aka the ones that are awesome and I would totally wear on a date or if I wanted to look cool but I can’t sit down in them). Here is the link if you also like to only stand wrapped in uncompromisable stiff denim that compromises your oxygen intake and digestive capacity. Finish off the look with some bulbous Doctor Martens that make me feel young, and make my feet look large – which is another thing I know people are into – chunky, HUGE shoes. But since I have small feet they can handle getting a boost of volume.

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Jacket | Jeans | Shirt | Beanie (similar)

I was recently purging SO MANY CLOTHES at our LA home to move out but before I did I made one of my best friends, Suzanne, come over and make sure I wasn’t going to regret much. Due to my years of these fashion posts, I had acquired a lot of clothes (and thus a lot of waste – shame on old Emily). I think I had 6 denim jackets. She made me keep those two. The sherpa one is a no-brainer but I was shocked by this one. I said “Oh I thought you said denim jackets are ‘basic’ and you made me stop wearing them last year.” She was like, “oh right yes, that was last year, they are back now I meant to tell you”. OH ok, cool, but she clarified – only oversized, or boyfriend in a ‘my clothes are too big for me’ kind of way. I get that it’s a look but it’s not my look. But this one is oversized, but still fitted in armpits (not too snug, but armpits properly flattered). It has some stretch making it more comfortable. Now that I think about it the only thing ‘boyfriend-y’ about it is the length. I know it looks kinda boring, but I wear it all the time. I feel cute in it and it’s super comfortable (I find that a lot of denim jackets are just too stiff and uncomfortable, this one is not… I realize that sounds hilarious/ironic considering in the last shot I was sporting jeans that prohibit my ability to take a large breath). But I truly do really like it.

Blazer | Jeans | Shirt (similar) | Boots

Lastly, I got suckered in by good styling to try out this blazer. Like I need a BLAZER RIGHT NOW. But this one is really flattering with cute leather details. But for whatever reason, I couldn’t make it look awesome. I think it’s likely because being in a forest wearing a blazer is totally weird. I will say this, if you are going back to the office and you want an unpredictable yet tame blazer to convince your boss or team that you have innovative ideas, this blazer is very very cool. I just don’t need a blazer because I live in the mountains. So my review is GREAT, but I just don’t need it.

There you go. Since we live up in the mountains without the postal service a lot of coats didn’t make it here in time (if you are looking forward to the demise of USPS I’d love to regale you with the annoyance it is to only have a P.O. box). Hopefully, you’ll never live in an area that isn’t incorporated and pay 2-day shipping that turns into a 12-day arrival. Long story short there were many coats I ordered to try that simply haven’t even gotten here yet (and thus have been canceled and returned). So if you are curious what else I love, we included an additional roundup. I have no idea how comfortable, flattering or wonderful they are but I do really, really like them. May we someday try on things in a ‘dressing room’ again, so as to not have this game of ‘buy and return’ that is in of itself highly wasteful. My goal with these posts is to help you buy with confidence to NOT have to return. xx

1. Chateau Puffer | 2. Wool Double-Breasted Coat | 3. Faux Fur Teddy Coat | 4. Dolman Quilted Denim Jacket | 5. James Jacket | 6. Rianne Blazer | 7. Fred Faux Leather Biker Jacket | 8. Straight-Cut Wool Coat | 9. The Corduroy Chore Jacket

**Photos by Veronica Crawford

The post New Fashion On My Body: The One Where I Dressed Like A Fisherwoman, Wore 6 Great Coats, AND An All Star Pair Of Boots appeared first on Emily Henderson.

from Emily Henderson https://stylebyemilyhenderson.com/blog/fall-coats-2020

Winter Lighting Hack: The Perfect Soft Glow Light To Make Staying In The Only Thing You’ll Want To Do (+66 Of Our Favorites)

There’s no question that the impending cold weather is bringing up some fear and sadness due to the fact that the sanity-saving outdoor activities are swiftly coming to a close (we do have a tricks here to expend that a little). BUT as we were talking about ways to help all of you make the most of cozier days at home, lighting naturally came to mind and more specifically that warm soft glow that can magically warm the soul.

Actually, I decided that for this post I was going to sit in my living room, dim my Noguchi paper pendant and let the delicate, warm light it emits be the backdrop. Is this “method blogging??” Indeed, there is just a natural peace that comes with sitting in a softly lit room. So let’s go a little deeper on how to get/what to look for when “a soft glow” is the goal. Then, because I have little control when it comes to rounding up beautiful lighting, there are about 66 options (floor lamps, table lamps, and plug-in sconces) for you to shop from if you don’t have the source to get some “glow” of your own.

P.S. I WISH that we had shots showing how beautiful these lights are at night but alas you will have to trust us. Also maybe we need to make night shoots a thing:)

photos by sara ligorria-tramp | left from: moto reveal: jess’ living room | right from: julie’s huge (and diy packed) bedroom upgrade

Here are your options. You can A. choose a natural material lamp that has a natural off-white color like Julie and I did with our pendants. B. buy a lamp whose whole purpose is to be glowy (you’ll see what I mean below) or C. choose either an amber, low wattage, or dimmable soft white light to create the glow you want. Actually, as I was researching lightbulbs, a lightbulb went off in my head. The less blue light the better! If “night mode” on your computer is meant to protect your eyes (it’s an amber-toned filter for those who don’t know), wouldn’t you want that same type of light in our home… especially in the evening when you are trying to wind down for bed?? My answer is yes.

I also want to be clear that we LOVE fun, colorful lamps and lampshades. Here and here are two posts proving that. BUT for this post, we wanted to go a bit more neutral and soft rather than moody and romantic (which is also a great call;)). Let’s get into it…

photo by sara ligorria-tramp | from: a quick update: the changes i’ve made to my la living room

Julie wrote a post this year about floor lamps because honestly, we felt that the design world had gone very “sconce” and we wanted to remind you all that floor lamps are ALSO where it is at. They can bring that sculptural moment your room needs and the light to bring a happier mood. These are my favorites for maximum soft glow potential.

1. Bridaine Wood and Brass Floor Lamp | 2. Tabitha Floor Lamp | 3. Metal Floor Lamp | 4. Globe Floor Lamp | 5. Parasol Floor Lamp | 6. Knixhult | 7. Great Jones Floor Lamp | 8. Oralee Glass Cylinder Floor Lamp | 9. Brixton Acacia Floor Lamp | 10. Siren Floor Lamp | 11. Vivian Floor Lamp | 12. Adjustable 65″ Floor Lamp | 13. Ellis Tripod Floor Lamp | 14. Modern Arm Floor Lamp | 15. Tanner Floor Lamp | 16. Floor Lamp with Wood Block Base | 17. Lauters | 18. Berkshire Floor Lamp | 19. Akari 10A | 20. Walker Medium Floor Lamp | 21. Clara Tripod Floor Lamp

If me talking up my pendant earlier doesn’t give it away, #2 and #19 are going to give you the glow you want (no special bulbs needed) and SO much style. #3, #16, and #17 are all under $80 dollars and have quiet but special details. For those you that might want to change the bulb on hand for a “softer” one, I have some options for you below. If you have a bigger budget, #7, #9, and #18 are so beautiful. Plus number #7 is naturally going to give you a beautiful light because of its natural tan lamp shade.

photo by sara ligorria-tramp | from: mountain house reveal: the coziest upstairs guest “bunk” bedroom

Table lamps are just my FAVORITE (hence why it’s the largest category…. I couldn’t stop pinning). Whether you live in a big or small space, a table lamp can be an unexpected style moment that really brings the room to life. I think if you are wanting to take a “safe design risk”, get a cool table lamp. Low risk, high reward. Plus with these, you get a lot of soothing glow…

1. Table Lamp with USB | 2. Priscilla Table Lamp | 3. JWDA Concrete Lamp | 4. Martin Table Lamp | 5. Matter Lamp | 6. Blekklint / Lunnom | 7. Striped Table Lamp | 8. Paper Lantern Table Lamp | 9. Altadena Glass Shade Lamp | 10. Globe Ambient Lamp | 11. White Frosted Glass Orb Lamp | 12. Staggered Milk Glass USB Lamp | 13. Angelo Rattan Lamp | 14. Sullivan Table Lamp | 15. Akari 24N | 16. Audrey Glass Accent Lamp | 17. Luna Lamp | 18. Tristan Ceramic Lamp | 19. Rattan Table Lamp | 20. Tala Knuckle Table Lamp | 21. Homer Lamp | 22. Tokabo | 23. Large Ceramic Lamp | 24. Word Table Lamp | 25. Mesa Ceramic Lamp | 26. Delilah Table Lamp | 27. Ribbed Glass Lamp

Let’s start with Em’s rec since this is after all her blog:) #3 (as you can see in the photo above) lives in her upstairs guest bedroom. To get work done without the distraction of the family, she likes to work in there and this lamp is apparently awesome. It’s dimmable, casts a warm, happy glow, and could go with almost any style. Now the top contenders for me personally are #2 (duh), #5, #21, and #24. There are all different but say, “I’m cool AND cozy” at the same time. I do also love #17. Julie (so many Julie callouts! Miss you!) used it in Grace’s very chic young adult bedroom. I was never that cool as a teenager. If you haven’t seen this room yet you have to check it out.

photo by sara ligorria-tramp | from: julie’s huge (and diy packed) bedroom upgrade

And finally the ever beautiful and ever practical plug-in sconce. The last thing you want next to your bed (or anywhere in your house if you ask me) is a BRIGHT, cold white light. Instead considering opting for a light that will actually help you wind down. I know it’s hard to believe but they exist and here they are…

1. Modern Swing Arm Sconce | 2. Tristan Ceramic Sconce | 3. Brass Sconce with Milk Glass Shade | 4. Elsie Adjustable Plug-In Sconce | 5. Cane Wall Lamp | 6. Lanyard Sconce | 7. Flugbo | 8. Lynea Lamp | 9. Sarfatti Sconce | 10. Cedric Sconce | 11. Imbrie Articulating Pull-Up Sconce | 12. Yoji Sconce | 13. Gram Sconce | 14. Chain Link Hook Sconce | 15. Pelle Gooseneck Sconce | 16. Marcella Rattan Sconce | 17. Brass Sconce with Milk Teardrop Shade | 18. Vintage-Style Sconce

Let’s talk styles. If you are more on the traditional side #1, #4, #11, #17, and #18 are going to work great. If you love a sleek modern look #3, #8, #10 and #13 are wonderful options. BUT if a more natural and eclectic look is what you love then check out #2, #5, #12, #16. Now picking a sconce is obviously just the first step. Figuring out how high to hang it is another ballgame. Don’t worry we’ve got you covered with this “how high to hang a sconce” post. Now let’s get a bit more technical, shall we?

photo by sara ligorria-tramp | from: it’s finally here: the reveal of the mountain house kitchen

I grew up in a pro dimmer household. If there was a light switch, my parents made sure to install a dimmer ASAP. Actually, as a kid, I loved bright lights and hated when they would dim them. “Yo, parents! I want to see where I am going.” Just kidding I would NEVER speak to them that way… but I definitely thought it. Apparently, I didn’t see the extreme value of the soft glow. Now as an adult I love a dimmer. Just like eating veggies, it just took me some time to get on the right side. So you bet that if I don’t have at least one dimmer in my home, Les Bunge will put one in… usually without asking (I am a very lucky daughter). Let’s talk about products for a sec.

1. LED Dimmer | 2. Regular Push-Button Dimmer | 3. Push-Button Switch Plate

According to Papa Bung (as my childhood best friend affectionately calls him) #1 is the way to go. It’s what I have and the range/dim smoothness (not a real term) is awesome. He also says that it lasts the longest because the big knobs tend to break off. Plus it’s pretty affordable and this one apparently works with almost all light bulbs but ALWAYS double-check. Now as a design snob, I love an old fashioned delicate know look. #2 and #3 are actually a package deal but are so pretty. Maybe for my next apartment??

1. Vintage Light Bulb | 2. Goodnight^® LED Bulb (set of 2) | 3. Miracle LED Nature’s Vibe Relax Sweet Dreams Nighttime LED Light Bulb (set of 2)| 4. Dimmable Wireless Edison Smart Light Bulb with Bluetooth | 5. LED Tala Porcelain II G25 Matte White 6W Bulb | 6. GE Lighting Relax HD LED Light Bulb (set of 2)

Lastly, let’s talk light bulbs. Not all are created equal. First, you want to focus on the type of light the bulb emits. Most of the ones I have linked here are made specifically for relaxing (one even has bluetooth). But you can also use a plain “soft white” one with an off white shade (and a dimmer IMHO) that will give you a simple calming effect. Just make sure that if you want to use a dimmer that the bulb you buy is dimmable. No one wants to do an unnecessary return right now, amirite?? Now Mallory bought #1 and truly cannot stop raving about it. So I figured I would let her tell you about it herself:

“I fell in love with an exposed bulb sconce and everyone told me it would be a problem, and they were right UNTIL I found this super low watt Edison bulb that’s stylish and gives off the coziest and warmest amber light. It’s now the light we turn on in the morning as we wake up and the last light on before we go to bed. If you have an exposed lightbulb kinda light DON’T SWEAT bc this will change your life and make your winter SO MUCH BETTER. ENJOYYYYY”

Hopefully, this post made you look a little forward to getting cozy and relaxed in your house while “the weather outside gets frightful”. Lighting has way more of an effect than we think so even if you simply switch out a bulb, it could totally change your mood. Happy Thursday and go vote or drop off your ballot in-person!

Opening Image Credit: Photo by Sara Ligorria-Tramp | From: Mountain House Reveal: Our Calm Scandinavian Master Bedroom

The post Winter Lighting Hack: The Perfect Soft Glow Light To Make Staying In The Only Thing You’ll Want To Do (+66 Of Our Favorites) appeared first on Emily Henderson.

from Emily Henderson https://stylebyemilyhenderson.com/blog/winter-lighting-hack

Albie’s About To Buy Her First Home But Saying No To A Big Reno AKA “Project Pressure”… It’s a Real Thing

Albie Fact: I’m a lifelong renter…happily. Even after marriage and a baby, we’ve never been in any rush to buy a house. Why not? Because we weren’t in any rush to take on everything that comes with homeownership — no one wants to be house rich, money poor!

2020 — in true “wtf” fashion — however, got us rethinking our life as renters; in truth, we realized it’s a life we’ve outlived and now we’re ready to take the plunge into homeownership. 

Making the decision to buy a house is already a huge one, and it involves a ton of pressure  — self-imposed — to choose the right one for my family but to also choose one that allows me to really flex my design skills. I’d be kidding myself if I pretended like my home isn’t basically my own personal showhouse. But buying, especially for the first time, burns enough mental calories to last a lifetime; so adding on anything additional would lead to a complete mental spiral. Think about it…the home buying process is one that is undeniably daunting, from the cost to the search to the paper intensive final steps. I don’t expect everything to be perfect right out of the gate — process-wise — so I am definitely not expecting perfection from the home itself. 

Naturally, as a designer and stylist, I can’t help but fantasize about what I’d do to my future home — I even have a Pinterest board to manifest our future home — but after a lifetime of renting, while I am riddled with big design ideas, I also refuse to succumb to “project pressure”.

photo by mariah texidor | yes, that’s my book!

What is “project pressure”?

So glad you asked! 

For starters, it’s something Jess & I came up with when talking about renter-friendly projects we’ve tackled — a whole different kind of project pressure by the way. Loosely defined, project pressure is the pressure to tackle every and any project imaginable in a new home, likely before even actually living in said home. 

Between design shows and social media, it’s really easy to get swept away in wanting to knock down walls, upgrade fixtures, and remove everything…even what’s bolted to the floor. But why? 

How do I know what I really want out of a future home before spending an entire fortnight there? Yes, I said fortnight. Are there things that I can assess beforehand as a “must have” or “must go” — i.e. carpet & popcorn ceilings? Absolutely! But knowing that I’m buying a home, even if not for a lifetime, I think I’ve earned some time to think things through, take my time, and design in phases. 

Now, if tackling projects is your jam…go for it. If you actually want a fixer upper…I’m rooting for you. But I think we’ve all gotten caught up in the notion of our homes needing projects…I mean, imagine a world where we just all move in and sit down. What would I write about without a project to do?! 

*cue the sarcasm*

I remember earlier this year deciding that I would no longer tackle any more projects in our 2 bedroom condo — I was all project’d out — and I wanted nothing more than to enjoy and live in the home that I’d spent the past 3 years designing & redesigning. To be honest, even though I knew there was so much more that I could do, I just got tired of tinkering. I had project fatigue! I wanted a break. I wanted to reset the way I felt about the way I lived. 

photo by me | fall 2018 orc

About 6 months after that decision, I decided it was time to finally tackle a room I’d been avoiding the entire time — the living room. I am certain that without that design respite, I wouldn’t have gotten that new surge of inspiration. The possibility of having my own home — ya know, that I own own — is a different kind of inspiration. No one to ask for permission. No worries about putting it all back. No one to answer to but ourselves. But if it ain’t broke and it’s not impeding me from enjoying the new home, what’s the rush. Just because I can, it doesn’t mean I should. 

design by me | photo by mariah texidor

Where does project pressure come from?

To be completely honest, most project pressure is external — home design shows, social media, our personal circles — but a large part of it is definitely self-inflicted. 

So many design shows highlight the benefits of getting a fixer-upper which, for a lot of us, may translate to the “need” to find the worst house ever so we can love it back to life. On the other side of that, with social media (really, just Instagram) and Pinterest we’re inundated with everyone’s “highlight reel” home content and, lemme tell ya… homeowner imposter syndrome is real. “Is my house pretty enough?” “Is my house picture-perfect enough?” The feeling that you have to out project your last project for the sake of content may sound crazy but it’s a thing! These feelings of not doing enough or having enough or creating enough are something I read about all the time in my DMs and my answer is always the same:

No one else lives in our homes so the rush to the proverbial design finish line benefits no one else but us, for better or for worse. 

Now that I browse home listings like they’re Pinterest, I can instantly tell which homes will bring on an insane number of projects (translation: I hate everything but see “potential” in the home) versus those that will allow me to live in and enjoy the house for weeks & months before feeling the need to do work. Here’s what I know — I will never buy a fixer-upper, but I don’t need brand new. The sweet spot in the middle where it’s “turnkey” but I can also tinker is how I know I can curb any potential project pressure. 

Let’s browse a few of the listings we’ve looked at while I continue…

the first house we looked at

How am I saying no to project pressure?

Following so many home influencers and DIYers and interior designers, I’m not immune to wanting to take a paint brush to my home; but also know that the “newness” that we strive for when tackling back to back to back projects can quickly wear off…not to mention how quickly the costs can add up!

I’m not looking at any listings where I have to dig around with a magnifying glass to find the home’s potential. I don’t want potential. I’ve lived with “potential” as a renter my entire life, and potential = project pressure! I’m looking for homes where the current status will allow me to flex my creativity to make it our own, but is good enough that we can live with it as is if need be. 

house two

I’m also really honest with myself and having regular conversations with my husband about our must-haves and deal-breakers…down to the tiniest detail. For example: we would both prefer an open concept kitchen so we’ll likely never go for a home with a closed-off kitchen because it would mean a huge renovation; but we’d be willing to concede and go for a galley kitchen because the layout is a compromise we can live with and any potential renovation wouldn’t be as daunting as a full gut job. Knowing this ahead of time helps us manage our expectations and set somewhat realistic timelines for the projects we’d want to tackle.

house three

Lastly, being hyper-aware of our finances — nothing like thinking about homeownership to force you to really start adulting — puts us in a position to know exactly what we’ll have the financial bandwidth to handle. It’s the ultimate reality check (see what I did there). 

Is it easy? Not even a little bit. With everyone getting back to home, every day there seems to be a new project being revealed on my timeline every time I scroll. And did I mention that right now we’re in the middle of the One Room Challenge? Inspiration and projects everywhere! 

design by me | photo by mariah texidor

I know that while we’re thinking about homeownership, I won’t stop fantasizing about what that home will look like, but the resistance to actually do a bunch of projects is worth it if it means taking my time and not feeling crushed under the weight to keep up with everyone else’s project pace. 

Have you ever experienced project pressure? You know…after scrolling the interwebs or watching all your neighbors COVID renos, are you feeling the itch to grab a wet saw and install some tile? P.S. don’t. Have you given in or have you been able to resist? Let’s talk about it. 

Opening Image Credit: Design by Albie K. Buabeng (me) | Photo by Mariah Texidor

The post Albie’s About To Buy Her First Home But Saying No To A Big Reno AKA “Project Pressure”… It’s a Real Thing appeared first on Emily Henderson.

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